Overwhelm vs. Procrastination: Why You Can’t Start (and How to Fix It)

My wonderful, articulate friend Peg has mentioned on several occasions that she’s a procrastinator. But she’s also in the middle of a daunting task: cleaning out a house she’s lived in for many years. It’s filled with inherited items that carry deep sentimental value, along with her own belongings.

I can 100% relate to that feeling—when you don’t know how or where to start, so you just… don’t. do. anything.

So here’s the question: Are we putting things off, or are we simply overwhelmed?

Author and neuropsychotherapist Britt Frank refers to this sensation as “stuckness.” She says, "Stuckness is not a character flaw but rather a physiological state of shutdown in our brains—the fight-flight-freeze response.”
(Listen to the interview)

Overwhelm-induced procrastination happens when stress makes tasks feel enormous and unmanageable. This activates our brain’s protective response, leading to a kind of mental freeze or avoidance, which in turn creates a vicious cycle of guilt, anxiety, and more avoidance.

This stress response is often the beginning of a domino effect—mental fatigue, loss of motivation, and perfectionist thinking ("If I can’t do it all, I won’t do any of it"). We get caught in analysis paralysis, beat ourselves up, and convince ourselves that we’re lazy or broken.

To me, it feels like being stuck on a merry-go-round of negative thoughts with no way to get off.

The good news? You’re not alone. Studies show that at least 95% of people procrastinate occasionally, and about 15–20% do it consistently.
(Take the procrastination survey here)

Here are a few ways to get off that merry-go-round of anxiety and avoidance:

• Break big tasks into small, bite-sized chunks.
  Don’t clean the whole room—just start with the clothes in the closet.

• Set a 15-minute timer.
  Use it for quick wins, like clearing off the kitchen counter. You’d be surprised how much you can do in a short, focused burst.

• Declare your plan out loud.
  Say, “I’m cleaning the fridge today,” then send a photo of the victory to a friend.

• Ask a friend for help.
  A neutral party isn’t emotionally attached to your stuff and can help keep you on task. Bonus: it makes the process feel less lonely.

• Listen to music or a podcast.
  This keeps your brain occupied and helps fend off intrusive thoughts—plus, if you're a multitasker, it boosts that sense of accomplishment.

• Celebrate every win.
  Even if you donate one bag out of ten, that’s progress. And progress is what matters.

In Conclusion

If you’re feeling stuck, know that you’re in good company. You’re not lazy. You’re not broken. You’re human—and humans get overwhelmed, especially when the task ahead is emotionally loaded or feels too big to handle.

To my dear friend Peg: I see your effort, your strength, and your heart. You’re doing something hard—and you’re doing it anyway. That’s courage. Every drawer you sort, every item you let go of, is a small act of self-care and forward motion.

And to anyone else reading: even the tiniest action counts. We’re not aiming for perfection—we’re aiming for progress. One step at a time, one item at a time, one breath at a time. You've got this.

Kelly Rigo is the creative force behind Menopause Evolution.